Saturday, May 9, 2009


Literary agent Nathan Bransford likes to include puppies in his posts. This post does not have a puppy in it, but perhaps there will soon be one.

This week, we made the decision to get our son a puppy for his birthday next month. It's something my husband and I have been talking about for a while. DS is an only child, and our older dog, Teddy, has never quite forgiven him for being born. Ted isn't hostile to DS, he just ignores him. Even when DS throws a toy for him to fetch. It's rather heart-breaking.

DS is turning seven, and we think he's just the right age for a pet of "his own," though I know I'll end up doing most of the care. That's okay with me. Perhaps it will soothe the baby bug that still bites me from time to time.

However, after another of my middle of the night anxiety attacks, I realized that this puppy thing is another source of my anxiety. Although I really do want DS to have one, and I long for a cute little "person" to brighten up our lives, I'm not sure I'm quite ready for this change. We have a small house, and having two pets underfoot could be quite annoying. But, I always wanted three children so I guess this is the closest I'll get. And we've already told DS, so it's too late to change our minds.

Money is another issue. With DH out of work for the foreseeable future, I'm afraid we will come to bitterly regret the cost of another pet. But at the same time, his being home will facilitate housebreaking the new addition. It's the perpetual Catch-22: we either have time, or money, but not both.

I have thought long and hard about going back to work full time, but have decided that it's just not feasible right now. The problem is that any job I take would require an excessive commute, and we don't have child care options if DS should be sick on a day that I have an important meeting. It just won't work right now; he's too young. And things are going so well at the college. I really, truly love teaching. Whenever I pray about it, I feel that I shouldn't rush into any job right now. "Wait," the Holy Spirit says. So, I'll wait. And try to pick up the book again this summer.

I just hope the dog doesn't eat my manuscript!

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